Getting eaten by Stress at work

I've been in my new role for over a month. Losing weight week per week due to being too busy and do not have time to eat lunch at work. Sleep also eludes me, only sleeping for five to six hours a day because I get woken up by my thoughts about work. Stress at work is slowly eating me, my life and personality. I've been reading and watching videos on how to control and avoid stress at work but it still goes back. Am I that weak willed? I'm afraid to make mistakes, afraid to disappoint people, afraid to lose my job because of my monthly bills. Maybe I need to pray more? Find guidance from above?

What changed?

I have been a professional for 10 years and 6 months. I vividly remembered how excited I was being part of a company and in the workforce. Driven, excited, hungry to better myself everyday. Been through different career paths, SME, Trainer, a Team Leader and even an Operations Manager. I've come a long way in my career, working up the corporate ladder and dealing with different problems. Then, the Program or account that I've been working in closed. I was redeployed, which means I was waiting to be placed to another program. The recruiter was able to place me in a Work from Home program dealing with different cultures, policies, etc. I felt like I was new to the role, all my progress and expertise gone. Ever since then, I doubted myself if I'm fit for the role that I am in or was just lucky to be promoted all these years. The situation and environment made me unsure of myself and my confidence started to go down. It affected how I deal with people, my family but most importantly the love of my life. I reached out to my previous manager to check if there are any programs hiring for an Operations Manager so that I can go back onsite and get that groove back. Upon reaching out, he offered me a promotion. This promotion involves fixing a lot of things in the program that I'll be in. Thinking that this is a welcome challenge, I accepted it. I started in the new program this May and ever since starting, my expectation was I'll be better, I'll grow, this is what I was asking for but eventually I realized that I was too comfortable when I was working at home. Work problems started to become more difficult, I was starting to be shy and as much as possible didn't want to reach out to people who can help me out with my problems. I was trying to solve it all on my own. Now, I'm in a position where most of my work is ongoing, a lot of misses, I don't have my own ideas and thoughts, scared of getting fired but wanting to quit. I'm writing this down to help me cope with what I'm feeling. I made my partner cry because I told her I wanted to quit. Just blurting that though out without thinking about her and how it will affect her. She's also stressed, tired and lacks sleep, I should've made a plan on how we can secure our future despite wanting to quit. It has been difficult, there were times where I thought about just ending it all because I can't sleep due to the endless thoughts about work that comes to mind when I lie down but seeing the love of my life cry because of me, made me realize that I need to be strong for the both of us. She's trying to keep her end of the bargain, I should also do my part.

The grind - mobile blog

was there a time where you just want to quit your job then sleep at home? I experienced that. A huge reason behind it is toxic management. Managers who think highly of themselves yet can't deliver. Their Ego is bigger than their capabilities. I asked myself, why did a multi-million company hire that person? No people skills, not even good communication skills. That enlightened me... I'll make a difference in my own way. I should not be like those people. Never. I need to show the next in line that what they are doing is not right.



Did you experience that too?

Office politics

I think it's normal for us to work 8 hours a day 5 times a week. We had our fair share of opportunities in our workplace. Did you ever try to take that opportunity and move up? I did. I'm started working as a call center agent when I was 21 years old. Good for me because I was able to grab all the opportunities that was given to me by the management. But how about other people? While working and mingling with other people, I realized that not everyone would take that opportunity to move up. Why? It's because of OFFICE POLITICS.

There are a lot of driven and skilled workers all over the work place but they get demotivated because of office politics. These people are very good at their job but is not close or in good terms with people who have a higher rank than them. They also see people who are not prepared and skilled move up because they are close with their managers or good friends with them. It's sad because these people leave the company to find a better workplace where they can thrive and meet their goals just because they are not close with their managers.

You can help change the world!

A lot of people think that only social workers, government officials, policemen, doctors and a lot of other jobs can help change the world. NO. YOU ALSO CAN HELP CHANGE THE WORLD AND HELP PEOPLE.

How? By doing your job properly. If you're on a higher position like a supervisor, push your employees. Make them feel that they can also be a supervisor just like yourself. Appreciate them as a supervisor, your role is to be a leader, not a boss where you just push people and you get all the credit of their work. If they feel that they can be like you and have a better paycheck, you could help a family have a better future. You can help a child of your employee to get a better education.

If you're just an employee by doing your job properly and not wasting time, you can give the company more profit. If they company get's more profit, the company could expand and offer more jobs. With your productivity, you can help 100+ people get new and better paying jobs in the company you work for.

Disclaimer: Some supervisors, employees only think about themselves. DO NOT BE LIKE THEM. Have the guts to help change the world and don't worry, all the good deeds that you do, it'll surely go back to you.

I learned all of these from my mentors and being a trainer in a call center in Bacolod, Negros Occidental, Philippines. A lot of agents that I handled work for a reason, such as feeding their families, they need to send a sibling to school, for medical help for their parents, etc. As a trainer, it was my responsibility to help equip my agents to perform and if they perform, they could get regularized. There were times that an agent does not perform and for me that's my failure. If I was able to find another way or give extra effort in teaching that agent/employee, he/she could have kept his/her job and continue helping his/her family. So that means, as a supervisor, you have a commitment to help your employees family one way or the other. Inspire them that they could do better and get a better pay just like what you have right now.


Do you also have this kind of mindset? What made you have this kind of mindset too? Tell me about it. :)

Happiness from motivation - Call Center Blues

I've been working in a big call center in my city for 1 year and 6 months now and during that short time, I have experienced a lot of things already. I got promoted last 3 months ago to an SME or Subject Matter Expert. I am one of the people who are helping new agents (Newbies) so that they can get good scores and pass training. During those 3 months, I have met a lot of people with different stories. Some people work in a call center because they want to buy something, for their family, or sometimes just for fun. I realized that these people have different attitudes and stories. Once I enter the room during our pre-shift meeting which is a meeting for an hour before they take in calls, I see most of them are smiling. I start to talk and talk regarding in how to improve on their calls but when I talk to them personally, they have different problems and they are undergoing things that I can't even imagine. They are also broken. I thought that my life was not good, but after hearing their stories, it made me think that I am a lucky person but they still have the strength to smile and be happy. That made me realize one thing. I need to help these people to pass and make a career here in the company. I am now a happier person because of those trainees. Their motivation to work and earn money for whatever reason they are doing it made me happy. There are people who will do their best in order to achieve something. Maybe that pushed me to do better too and you should too. Do your best everyday and be happy. Be thankful for the things that you have and push yourself to strive or aim for a higher goal.

Crammed Manila Backpacking Trip Part 1

When I was still young, I thought that Manila is a city where the action happens. All the big events, celebrities, concerts and big businesses are in Manila which made me think that Manila is a place where I want to live in someday. People who are living in Manila that came from Bacolod says the opposite. It's better to live in Bacolod where everything is cleaner, greener and a lot less traffic compared to "Maynila" as they say it. That made me think, is Manila such a great city? Well, after having my first Manila trip at the age of 21, I would say the answer is a yes.

I never had plans to go to Manila anytime soon. My sisters, especially my eldest, second and third sister always go there due to business reasons, R and R, their favorite singer will have a concert there and etc. Around March, 2015, One Direction was going to be in Manila to have their concert. My eldest sister and her kids as well as my fourth sister was going to watch the concert and I was going to be left here in Bacolod because when they bought their tickets, I was still a student and did not have any money. But my third sister who was working in Manila, posted a comment on one of my posts saying that she has two free tickets to the One Direction concert and she told me that I can have one of the tickets. Then, I got very excited, because I was given a reason to go Manila. I also invited my girlfriend to go with me because she was born in Luzon and pretty much every two or three years goes to Pampanga or somewhere in Luzon to have a vacation. I invited her to be my Tagalog interpreter. I know how to speak Tagalog but i'm not good at it. I packed my bags and we were all set to Manila.

Our flight was in the evening. I thought it would be boring because I can't see the landscape of Manila. But when I saw the skyline of the city, I was mesmerized. The abundance of lights, the streetlights of cars moving and also standing by (because of the traffic) was beautiful. After an hour and a half of flying time, there I was, in the big city. My sisters, knowing that I love eating as well as scrumptious food always spoil me and treat me in good restaurants. Our first stop is Tonkatsu in Greenbelt 3. As an avid watcher of Anime and reader of Manga, I started loving Japanese food, their Tonkatsu in tonkatsu was tender and not oily. The serving was just right and what made the meal greater was their shredded cabbage partnered with roasted garlic sauce. Even just the cabbage and the sauce was good as a meal for me. We went around Greenbelt for around 30 mins and it was huge! It was like the hub of rich kids and their rich friends. A lot of people were dressed to impress and there I was, wearing shorts, full of dust and carrying my huge back pack. I really looked like a "Probinsyano" or a person from the province. Even just looking at stores which were closed because it was around 10:30 but parts of the mall was still open because of their dining area, amazed me. After roaming around we went to the condominium that we rented for two days. The city was still jam packed even though it was around 11 pm already which was an uncommon thing in Bacolod especially it was a weekday and that is when I realized, I really am a "Probinsyano".

This is just the first part of my Crammed Manila Backpacking Trip. It was a fun and exciting trip so one post won't be enough. Hahaha. What are your thoughts about Manila? Tell me in the comments below! :)